Thursday 29 December 2011

Session 36 - New Years Special









Well, its been another year and what cool shit happened this year! Bin Laden, Qaddafi and Kim Jin-Jong Ill, all dead. Makes you think that Team America might actually Exist!

Quite a normal episode this week, apart from we have added some "2011 in review" pics, I'm sure you get the gist.

We were looking through the stats today and according to Google analytics, these are the most popular/most viewed episodes we have done:

1. Session 16
2. Session 18
3. Session 29
4. Session 30
5. Session 26

Make sure you have a good New Years, get pissed, and remember, the world ends next year so this is the last time you will be able to celebrate New Years Eve :(

Enjoy...





SONG OF THE YEAR
We took a vote and this is what we reckon the best song of 2011 was. We're happy to argue the point!





PICS
If you can't see the image properly, click on it


Remember that!



I have a dream...



Getting there



Don't deny it



Silence is golden



Do you feel the noises too?



errr...



I think most ex-girlfriends have this weird fetish



You know it



Our apologies



Makes sense to me



Don't ask if you don't want the answer



Soup of the year more like



ABC News, bringing you what you want when you want it



So?



Take that metaphors



Take note women!



White people just ain't got rythym



The little bastards



true, true



Go and try this right now



The power of marketing


I tried this, I ended up doing 2 years in Belmash! Shows its true




FAIL



If it's not broke, don't fix it right!



I would let her off



Don't show your girlfriends this!



I'm loving the strap on!



Some people just don't get the hint



Nice bit of photoshop work there



Now we know



lol



The simple things in life



I want to meet Mr Gumby!



An Amish drive thru



Its all about getting it just right



Contracting out work is the key to success



Could it get any worse!



Make him a bottle of milk he can't refuse



Fucking animals stealing all our jobs!



GIFS
If the GIF isn't moving, click on it

the new cutbacks at Thorpe Park!








WTF








Fuck you pig








ouch








I don't even get this in the slightest








I wish I had things that made me this excited








ok...








Don't mess








is this racism?








follow the finger








Don;t try this at home... try it a mates house








kitty got skills








why...








lol








World economics in 3 seconds





TIME'S MOST SURPRISING PICTURES OF THE YEAR
42 of Times most bizarre, strange, weird or most surprising pics of 2011














































AUTOCORRECT
A collection of SMS messages that have gone slightly wrong!














DEATH WATCH
Its been one hell of a year for famous people dying! Below is a list of the ones we can remember. Don't worry, if you're not sure who they are, click on the name as each one is linked to Wiki! Aren't we good to you!





DON'T EVEN REPLY
Below is the transcript of an email conversation with someone who placed an online advert on Craiglist


Original ad:
i want a flatscreen tv. at least 40 inches and under $500. hit me up if you got what i want


From Me to ***********@**********.org:

Hey,

I am selling my 42" Westinghouse plasma TV for $400. It is in excellent condition. I'm just selling it because I got a bigger one and don't need this one anymore. Let me know if you are interested.

Mike

From jim ****** to Me:

yeah man thats perfect. ill buy that as soon as possible. would you be able to bring it to my house? i dont have a car. im home pretty much all day every day

you can call me if you want 610-***-****

From me to jim ******:

No problem, Jim. I could bring it by tomorrow after work. Are you sure you want to buy it though? I don't want to bring it there and have you decide you don't want to buy it.

Mike

From jim ****** to Me:

no i definitely want it. just bring it over man

my address is 415 ********* rd, ******, PA
just call me if you have any trouble

From me to jim ******:

Okay, I'll be over tomorrow.

From me to jim ******:

Jim,

I'm very sorry I was unable to make it to your house today. I had the TV loaded in the back of my pickup truck, and I was all set to go to your house. I just decided to make a quick stop in Chester to buy some stuff from a friend, and when I got back to my truck, the TV was gone. I can't figure out what the hell happened to it. I'm thinking maybe I hit a bump and it slid out of the truck, because I do forget to close my tailgate sometimes. I don't really remember if it was in the truck when I parked it, so I am baffled.



Once again, I am very sorry that I lost the TV that I was going to sell you, but hopefully this magazine can help you out.

Mike

From jim ****** to Me:

are you out of your fuckin mind i dont want any fuckin magazines!!! what the fuck.. you better fuckin cancel that shit. what the fuck were you thinking dude, im not paying for that you fuckin dumbass

From jim ****** to Me:

and its obvious YOUR TV WAS STOLEN YOU FUCKIN RETARD. why the FUCK would you leave a tv in the back of your truck in chester?

cancel the fuckin magazines..NOW.

From me to jim ******:

Jim,

Why do you want me to cancel the magazines? It is a great magazine and I got you a great deal for it. You won't find it cheaper anywhere else. Also, to put it frankly, if you were going to buy a Westinghouse plasma TV from me without even looking at it, then it is clear you still have a lot to learn about plasma TVs. Reading this magazine will make you an expert in no time.

Mike

From jim ****** to Me:

you fuckin asshole i dont want to pay for some stupid magazine! i just want a goddamn tv. who the fuck would want to read a fuckin weekly magazine about tvs?! cancel it right now. im serious

From me to jim ******:

Jim,

I'm sorry you feel that way about the magazine. I was just trying to help. Unfortunately I cannot cancel the magazine. When I signed you up on the phone, they gave me a confirmation number I could use to cancel the subscription. I couldn't find a piece of paper to write it on, so I wrote the number on a napkin. I think I accidentally used the napkin to wipe my face after eating wings last night, and then threw it out. I'd look through the trash to find it for you, but the garbage truck already picked it up this morning. I think they take it to the dump/recycling center in Media if you want to go look for it. It was a napkin from Taco Bell, if that helps. I usually get all my napkins there.

If you think it would be easier, you could just cancel it once you get your first magazine in the mail. You'll probably be billed for the first month, plus a $75 cancellation fee because I didn't sign you up for cancellation insurance. I just assumed you would want to keep the magazine.

Mike

From jim ****** to Me:

i cant believe i just read all that shit because i should have known from the first few lines that you were a fuckin idiot

i dont care if you have to blow the fuckin editor, you better find a way to get it cancelled because i am not spending a goddamn nickel on that magazine!

From me to jim ******:

Jim,

If you don't pay for it, that may screw up your credit. I remember one time I forgot to pay my TV guide subscription for about 14 months, and that really messed up my credit. I had trouble buying a house because of that. You should be careful.

Since you seem to not know a lot about the importance of your credit, I signed you up for a year subscription of In Debt Weekly, a great magazine that can teach you a lot about credit. Don't worry, I got you the same discount as before, and this magazine is actually a little bit cheaper. It is only $34.99 a year. It came with a discounted subscription to Card Times, another magazine about credit cards. That one is only $25 per year, so I signed you up for that as well. It is a decent magazine for the price.

Mike

From jim ****** to Me:

GL4KJHSGSKFKJS YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE STOP SIGNING ME UP FOR FUCKING MAGAZINES!!!!

CANCEL THOSE RIGHT NOW MOTHERFUCKER!!!!

From me to jim ******:

Jim,

There is no need for that kind of language. Please do not talk to me anymore.

Unless you would be interested in a subscription to Anger Management Journal. I can sign you up for that if you want to learn how to control your temper.

Mike

From jim ****** to Me:

FUCK YOU



GOOGLE SEARCHES ETC
So what was the most Google'd thing in 2011, below are the answers. If you would like to know more about the Google Zeitgeist,  please use this link. Google Zeitgeist



1. Rebbecca Black

2. Google Plus

3. Ryan Dunn

4. Casey Anthony

5. Battlefield 3

6. iPhone 5

7. Adele

8. Japan Tsunami

9. Steve jobs

10. iPad 2




FACEBOOK
This week's best and worse from the world of Facebook















THE 45 MOST POWERFUL IMAGES OF 2011
A selection of the most powerful images this year according to a poll by the BBC/Reuters



A before and after shot of Joplin, Missouri after a massive tornado on May 22.




A phone hangs off the hook on Wall Street.




A demonstrator shows his bottom to riot police during a protest by European workers and trade union representatives to demand better job protection in the European Union countries in Brussels on March 24.





An aid worker using an iPad captures an image of a dead cow's decomposing carcass in Wajir near the Kenya-Somalia border on July 23.





Police spray Ugandan opposition party leaders with colored water during demonstrations in the capital Kampala on May 10.





Slain Navy SEAL Jon Tumilson's dog "Hawkeye" lies next to his casket during funeral services in Rockford, Iowa. Tumilson was one of 30 American soldiers killed in Afghanistan on August 6 when their helicopter was shot down during a mission to help fellow troops who had come under fire.




Christians protect Muslims during prayer in Cairo, Egypt.



Hurricane Irene approaches the east coast.




Office workers gather on the sidewalk in downtown Washington, D.C., moments after a 5.9-magnitude earthquake shook the nation's capital. The earthquake was centered northwest of Richmond, Va., but could be felt from North Carolina to Massachusetts.





Robert Peraza, who lost his son Robert David Peraza in 9/11, pauses at his son’s name at the North Pool of the 9/11 Memorial.





This sightseeing boat, Hama Yuri, was pulled 1300 feet from the coast and somehow balanced itself on a two story house during the tsunami in Japan.





A mother comforts her son in Concord, Alabama, near his house which was completely destroyed by a tornado in April.





A woman rebel fighter supporter fires an AK-47 rifle as she reacts to the news of the withdrawal of Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi's forces from Benghazi on March 19.




A Libyan rebel is pictured with Gadhafi's golden gun.




A woman jumps from a burning building during the London riots in August. (Amy Weston / WENN.com)





Facebook played an extremely important role in the uprisings throughout the Middle East.





84-year-old Dorli Rainey was pepper sprayed during a peaceful march in Seattle, Washington. She would have been thrown to the ground and trampled, but luckily a fellow protester and Iraq vet was there to save her.





A protester gets sprayed in the face with pepper spray at an Occupy Portland protest.





Members of the national security team receive an update on the mission against Osama bin Laden in the Situation Room of the White House on May 1.





Chile's Puyehue volcano erupts, causing air traffic cancellations across South America, New Zealand, Australia and forcing over 3,000 people to evacuate.





A U.S. Army soldier takes five with an Afghan boy during a patrol in Pul-e Alam, a town in Logar province, eastern Afghanistan.




An aerial shot of the damage immediately following the Japanese tsunami.




A man sits in front of a destroyed apartment building following the Joplin, Missouri tornado.





A girl in isolation for radiation screening looks at her dog through a window in Nihonmatsu, Japan on March 14





Mihag Gedi Farah, a seven-month-old child, is held by his mother in a field hospital of the International Rescue Committee in the town of Dadaab, Kenya. The baby has since made a full recovery.





US gay service members march in a gay pride parade for the first time ever.





A boy looks at a figure of Steve Jobs next to flowers laid in his tribute at an Apple store in Hong Kong, China.





A policeman detains an opposition activist in Baku on March 12. Azerbaijan police detained more than 30 activists of the opposition Musavat Party when its members took to the street of Baku to protest against the ruling elite following a similar rally a day before.





Harold Camping speaks about the end of the world. The world was supposed to end on May 22 of this year.





Cars are abandoned on Chicago's Lake Shore Drive during the "Snowpocalypse" in February.





Friends and loved ones gather at the Oslo cathedral to mourn 93 victims killed in twin terror attacks from a bombing in downtown Oslo and a mass shooting on Utoya island on July 22.





Two lights from the former site of the World Trade Centers shine for the 10th anniversary of 9/11.





Phyllis Siegel, 76, left, and Connie Kopelov, 84, both of New York, embrace after becoming the first same-sex couple to get married at the Manhattan City Clerk's office.





Australian Scott Jones kisses his Canadian girlfriend Alex Thomas after she was knocked to the ground by a police officer's riot shield in Vancouver, British Columbia. Canadians rioted after the Vancouver Canucks lost the Stanley Cup to the Boston Bruins.





A monstrous dust storm (Haboob) roared through Phoenix, Arizona in July.





A woman cries while sitting on a road amid the destroyed city of Natori, Miyagi Prefecture in northern Japan after the massive earthquake and tsunami.





A woman hangs onto a street sign in chest deep water along the flooded streets in Rangsit on the outskirts of Bangkok on October 24.





A University of California Davis police officer pepper-sprays students during their sit-in at an "Occupy UCD" demonstration in Davis, California.





A distressed bride attempts suicide in China after her fiance abruptly called off their marriage. Still in her wedding gown, she tried to kill herself by jumping out of a window of a seventh floor building. Right as she jumped, a man managed to catch and save her.





A student is punched in the face by a police officer in Chile. Students in Chile are demanding a new framework for education.





Firefighters of Ladder Company 4 — which lost seven men on 9/11 — perched together on their aerial ladder, watching a news bulletin in Times Square declaring that Osama bin Laden was dead on May 2.




A whirpool forms off the Japanese coast after the tsunami on March 11




Billy Stinson comforts his daughter Erin Stinson as they sit on the steps where their cottage once stood on August 28 in Nags Head, N.C. The cottage, built in 1903 and destroyed by Hurricane Irene, was one of the first vacation cottages built on Albemarle Sound in Nags Head.





Flowers and tributes are seen outside the home of Amy Winehouse in London on July 24.





Office workers look for a way out of a high rise building in central Christchurch, New Zealand on February 22. A strong earthquake killed at least 180 people.








NINJA TURTLES
Next time you're bored remember, everyone has a secret ninja turtle lurking within them!




















FAIL
A short collection of FAILS from the week


















COMIC STRIP








































JOKES




How do you start a rave in Africa?

Glue toast to the ceiling.




I went to a party last night. I thought I looked pretty smart, but some Jewish cunt said, "The '70s called... They want their shirt back!"

I said, "The '40s called... Your shower's ready."





Every Christmas I'd come running downstairs to the big pile of presents and start unwrapping them as fast as I could. Sometimes there would be fights over who had the best toys but we would all make up later and sit down to have a three hour lunch before watching TV for the rest of the day.

I really miss working at the Royal Mail sorting office.






I used to play Skyrim.
But then I took a vagina to the dick.





I said to my parents, "Mum, Dad... I've decided to live on my own from now on."

"Okay, cool," they replied.

"Your luggage is outside," I added.







"Can you get some bleach and some washing powder whilst you're out?" my wife asked.

"Can you not wait until you've opened your presents tomorrow?" I replied.




VIDEOS




























































  

HAPPY NEW YEAR!